uh-oh (gaming 2004, part 3)

Disappointments and Worst Of Year

And then there were these.

We've talked about best games and plainly enjoyable ones, but this is where the gum really is scraped off the shoe. These are the biggest personal disappointments and the worst games I played all year.

-James Bond 007: Everything Or Nothing / Onimusha 3: Demon Seige
Despite O3's excellent opening film and EON's fluid character movements, these games simply couldn't maintain interest...they bored me. When I start a game and don't go back to them for weeks on end, when I decide that (gasp) reading a book sounds like more fun, I don't know what to think.

-Destruction Derby Arenas / Fight Club / Syphon Filter: Omega Strain
I tried demos of each of these, looking forward to them due to their predecessors and source materials. But each left too much to be desired, and were offenses to their namesakes. Shame on you, offenses.

-Manhunt
From the Rockstar crew, known for wildly varying degrees of success, this snuff-film-as-videogame was great on controls, mood, suspense...but left me feeling dirty after every session. I've never felt so wrong playing a game. So in need of a shower after beating a level. That aside, after all that drudgery, I was hoping for a bit more interesting ending. But Brian Cox offers terrific voice work. Now maybe he can do so in a less repugnant game.

-Ghosthunter
Craphunter.

...and the WORST, MOST DISAPPOINTING GAME OF THE YEAR:

-DRIVER 3
Reprehensible graphics, awful controls, glitches to rival a thing of many glitches, and to be honest, just no fun at all. Toss this stinking disk of shame into an open sewer, and watch the waste flee in disgust.

Yeah, that pretty much covers it.

quite enjoyable (gaming 2004, part 2)

Solid Options

There are games you place on pedestals, and there are games you toss out windows. Somewhere in between those disparate groups are the solid, enjoyable games that might get forgotten. Unless you make a list and dig it out on December 31st.

-Baldur's Gate: Dark Alliance II / Champions Of Norrath
These almost identical but extremely enjoyable RPGs were two of the only games I could play with Crys. This made them extra special, since she won't let me needlessly thrash her at 2-player fighters. And since she was hit by a car as a child and has this thing about speeding hunks of burning metal careening toward her while anonymous alt-rock songs blare from the speakers, she's understandably a bit skittish about racing games. That said, killing ogre-kings and grabbing dwarf-sacks of gold are welcome entertainments. These games seemed to last much longer than average fare, and they were good-looking to boot.

-The Suffering
While it's premise (you're a convicted murderer and possibly even a tad crazy!) might give you pause, The Suffering is basically an awesomely fun shoot-'em-up, setting your character loose on the evil, ghostly minions of an island prison gone very wrong. If run and gun is your specialty, you have to give this one a try. It's well worth the time.

-X-Men Legends
While Crys and I have not gotten far in this RPG based on the Marvel super-hero team, I have to say it's a nice departure from a) crappy Marvel super-hero games and b) RPGs about ogre-kings and dwarf-sacks. Bright and colorful, fun and full of options, this is a terrific choice.

-Ninja Gaiden
(honorable mention)
I place this one here because it's a deliciously gorgeous game, and fun to learn, but MAN, it is difficult beyond my wildest dreams. I hate to sound like a big puss, but this game kicked my ass into next week, where I promptly sold it for store credit so I could buy something less intimidating. But I can't deny it is a beautifully crafted game.

And on to the worst...

the very best (gaming 2004, part 1)

Virtual Best Of

The best games seemed to spill out onto the public in the second half of the year. They were immediate successes, and despite occasional glitches and disappointments, they all are instant classics, setting bars higher and higher for developers of future classics.

Since you (probably) already know enough about each of these, I'll keep it brief. The Best Games of 2004, with reservations (where applicable):

#5: Halo 2 (ending could have used some work, and having so little time in Earth landscapes was kind of a rip) - Such a beautiful and fun game that its length and inability to evolve didn't really matter.

#4: Katamari Damacy - Simplicity and a quirky nature are its genius. The soundtrack is unique and as addictive as tar heroin.

#3: Burnout 3: Takedown - One of the most awesome and highly-charged games in the history of gaming. Period.

#2: The Chronicles Of Riddick: Escape From Butcher's Bay (while shorter than I'd have liked, still awe-inspiring) - Polished graphics, a delightful balance of stealth, action and cinematic fun, and terrific mood and atmosphere make this the best game of the year - except for...

#1: GRAND THEFT AUTO: SAN ANDREAS (despite some annoying glitches and a few levels that were difficult to the point of cursing the names of Rockstar's founders) It's vast. It offers 100 times the gameplay of the average game as well as new and different game elements. It has a hard edge, good humor and the best soundtrack this side of your own CD collection. But more than all that, it has interesting characters that you watch change and grow, and you hate to see them go when you role past 100%...and even better, you don't have to.

Now, on to the just-plain-old good stuff...